Image Description: A stock photo of a college campus, where students sit under trees or walk down the sidewalk.
This is yet another project that I have been waiting to share since I started going to A&M. So many random, amusing, and delightful occurrences seemed to happen frequently around campus and my apartment complex and, if I was lucky enough to be looking and listening, I made a note of it for the very purpose of one day sharing it to anyone else lucky enough to find my blog. I had to cut some lesser things out so as not to overwhelm you with my amount of notes.
Enjoy my first year of randomness.
Fall of 2021
- A balcony with three Texas flags, including one that is Whataburger themed.
- A pirate flag stuck in a tree.
- A girl with a cheeseburger backpack.
- A guy wearing a Longhorn's shirt. On A&M grounds.
- A unicorn piñata on someone's front porch.
- A life-size cutout of an anime character shamelessly taped in a dorm window (at least I hope it was a dorm).
- Giant googly eyes on someone's front door (for Spooky Season, of course).
- A girl walking around, not with a travel mug, but a regular mug.
- Sociology Professor, raising her hand: "Have any of you smoked pansies?"
Student: "Not that I can recall."
- What appeared to be either a Xolo puppy or a hairless chihuahua.
- A guy wearing a hoodie that says, "I ❤️ hot moms."
- A guy carrying a skateboard while wearing an arm cast. Some stories tell themselves.
- A toothbrush in a cup. In a public bathroom.
- A Jeep tire cover depicting a grizzly bear surfing a great white shark. And firing a machine gun.
- Student, before class: "How long do we wait until we can legally go?"
The Prof, walking up: "Fifteen minutes."
- A girl holding up a shirt while talking on the phone: "It's a small! He thinks I'm skinny! Cute!"
- Some students making a short film or something in the hallway. A guy in a trenchcoat "flashes" two students sitting on the stairs. They throw their shoes at him, the guy student exclaiming like a girl and the girl student half-heartedly shouting, "The power of Nike compels you!"
- Our Sociology professor tells the story of when she was in highschool and she and her nerd friends hacked a vending machine, changed all the prices to a nickel, cleaned it out, changed the prices back, and no one was ever the wiser.
- Reading an article about Holocaust justifications while "Fireball" by Pitbull plays over the loudspeakers.
- I walk into the bathroom and see what I *hope* is a dog in one of the stalls and not a person in a fursuit. Lo and behold, it's Lady Reville!
- A female with a shaved head in a trenchcoat gliding by on a longboard. I can't believe that I had the privilege to personally witness a Main Character.
- Upon getting off at my stop after blowing some bubbles on the bus, a girl tells me, "That made my day! I'm high right now, so that was great!" Happy to be of service.
Image Description: A slide explaining Spanish reflexive pronouns, using the Professor's chihuahua Bruno in the example sentences, accompanied by a photo of Bruno sleeping with a paw in the air.
Spanish class:
- My prof liked to occasionally use his dog Bruno as examples in the slides.
- My prof, who is from Yucatán, confirmed that Yucatán does indeed mean "I do not understand what you are saying."
- He forgot the word for Bakery. The Spanish word.
- Due to his goatee, curly hair, and affinity for pants, I had suspected him of being a satyr. However, I saw his ankles and they were regular. I was genuinely disappointed.
- Watching a short film about a woman with a dissatisfactory life and is about to cry*
Girl student: "That lady is me."
Guy student: "That lady is ME."
- The prof writes on his arms all the time but nobody ever notices because of his sleeve tats.
- He once caught a yellowjacket and carried it outside on his finger like a butterfly.
- One student's boyfriend printed off every single one of the Powerpoint slides for her to use for the open-note exam. It's over 100 pages. Double sided. All in color. Until the printer ran out of ink midway.
- Everyone else finally realized that he's married and were sufficiently freaked out. The ~suspected gay~ declares, "A handsome guy like him? Of course!"
- Quotes from the Prof:
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*showing us a chart of the irregular imperfect verbs* "I'm showing you this so that you can get used to pronunciation and so you can warm up to this hell."
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"Go to page 157 and read the conversation and figure out what the hell they're saying."
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STUDENT: "You're giving me super anxiety listening to you speaking in Spanish the whole time." PROF: "It's ok, I'm anxious speaking Spanish too."
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*nervous student is chosen to answer a question* *the projector suddenly shuts off* STUDENT: "See?! God is giving you a sign!" PROF, rebooting the computer*: "Can I defy God? Yes."
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*gives us a harder assignment* "Don't hate me. Or do, if it helps you learn better."
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STUDENT: "I refuse to learn French." PROF: "Good for you!"
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STUDENT: "I was adopted from Russia." PROF: "Oh! We have a comrade!"
Image: A poster on a pole with a picture of a squirrel reading still missing! If found please contact @officialmissingsquirrel on Instagram.
Image: There is a statue of the university's former president Lawrence "Sully" Ross in the middle of campus, where people sometimes leave things like coins. Here, there's a calculator with a note reading "I am a sacrifice to Sully. I no longer work." I didn't notice the note reading "white supremacist" in the corner until way later.
Image: A news article from 27 April 1957 titled He Went on "Making a Fool of Himself' All His Life."
Image: A library book titled Briefing For A Descent Into Hell by Lessing.
Image: Two photos from a news article from 1923 to 63. The photo of zebras has a caption reading "What a coincidence! I was in the Bureau of Internal Revenue too!" The photo of a cat has a caption reading "Influence peddling? I was only trying to help one of the Veep's constituents!"
Image: A tree illuminated by the teal and purple light of a nearby marquee.
Spring of 2022
- Some people advertising their new cat cafe AND THEY BROUGHT A CAT AS THEIR SPOKESPERSON AND SHE WAS SLEEPING AND SHE WAS SOFT AS A BUNNY AND I WOULD KILL FOR HER.
- I've seen a number of service dogs on campus, including a scraggly chihuahua that looked like a long-haired shrimp in a life-vest.
- A girl crocheting a bralette on the bus. Color me impressed.
- A guy advertising his org just casually "falls" on the floor in front of passer-bys, still holding his sign, still schmoozing.
- A girl with a sport psychology textbook, an Aggie Sisters Healthcare shirt, and laptop stickers for the Air Force, rocket science, chemistry, physics, soccer, and Mac n cheese. WHO IS THIS WOMAN?
- The Australian / New Zealander student in my Spanish class. she said she's from Austen. That's cool.
- A black Mustang-looking sports car pulling up, somebody curling up into its trunk, and then it speeds away. It is around 8:30 pm.
- My roommate, on the phone: "A bat?! Like, CAW-CAW, a bat?!"
- It's midterm week. I catch a classmate purchasing books and chocolates in bulk on Amazon, as well as what I hope are some massage tools. Sounds like a great Spring Break.
- Tutoring in one classroom at 7 pm while "The Greatest Showman" blasts next door.
- A guy teaches his girlfriend card tricks at Starbucks.
- A woman on the bus in a professional outfit holding black heels in her hands while wearing pink Crocs with cute gibitz. She is smart and she is going places.
- A classmate with tiny jars full of pebbles for earrings. She also drinks iced coffee from a paste sauce jar. I think she's a witch.
Summer of 2022
- A desk in the women's bathroom. "Naughty students must take exams in the crapper," I guess.
- A mouse in the new Physical Education building. Mice needs their credits too.
- A girl wearing what at first glance appears to be a Winnie the Pooh hat, but had eyes on the backs of the ears. To ward off predators, I assume.
- A black SUV with a plaque reading COVERT in place of a license plate.
- 9:20 pm. Friend: "It's five hours past my bedtime."
Image: A bicycle in a tree.
Image: A teeny tiny pink paper hat with the words Shaky Table.
Image: A white board bearing all sorts of random things. "NO STAY AWAY" is scrawled at the bottom. "Psychology of Cybertronian Girlbosses" is in the middle. Prostitutes is marked through under that. An arrow connects the word Bananpeño to a a drawing of what supposedly it depicts.
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